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Oh, Beloved. I continue our conversation — deepening here with this timely continuation. Both then/And now. Time is loosening. Hold me. ~LP
….The way of Tantra is not one of blind sensuality — and not only of spirituality either. It is of both/and. Tantra does not believe in the philosophy of either/or: it believes in the philosophy of both/and. It does not reject anything — it transforms everything. Only cowards reject. And if you reject something you will be that much poorer — because something has been left untransformed. A part of you will remain ungrown; a part of you will remain childish. Your maturity will never be total. It will be like your one leg remains on the first rung and your hand has reached to the last rung: you will be stretched along this polarity and you will be in anguish, in agony; your life will not be of ecstasy.

That’s why I say I preach Epicurus and Buddha together to you. Epicurus remains with the outer wall of the Khajuraho temple; he is right as far as he goes, but he does not go far enough. He simply takes a walk around the temple and goes home; he is not aware that he has missed the very point of the temple. Those outer walls are only outer walls; they exist for the inner shrine.
Buddha goes into the inner shrine, sits there. In that silence he remains, but he forgets about the outer wall. And without the outer wall there is no inner shrine.
To me, both are lopsided, half-half. Something has been rejected and something has been chosen — they have not been choiceless. I say to you: Accept all! the outer and the inner, the without and the within, and you will be the richest sannyasins upon the earth.
Drop guilt!


Tantra is the whole way — neither obsession with the world, nor withdrawal from it. It is being in the world lightly, with a little smile. It is playfulness. It doesn’t take things seriously. It is light of heart, it laughs. It is unashamedly earthly and infinitely other-earthly. The earth and the sky meet in Tantra; it is the meeting of polar opposites…

OSHO:

Walk Without Feet, Fly Without Wings and Think Without Mind, Chapter 10

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Nine Months since I called you feeling that I was  ‘going way out on a limb’ saying that I thought we should see each other before I left for the states. After just meeting you for the first time some few days before. Unexpected.

Nine Months since you took the train from Remptendorf to Berlin and spent the weekend with me in tree-lined  Steglitz apartment. Me packing, tying up some loose ends with Mahadevi, more packing. No plan what was happening. After all, we had only sat next to each other on the bench at Oshostadt, held hands and talked some. One kiss only.

Nine Months since you left back to your office near the forest, and I early the next morning back to Seattle after two months in Berlin. That Monday was the Mayan Calendar New Year.  That Sunday the first day we made some loving — my favorite ‘Day out of Time’. Definitely unrehearsed.

Nine Months since I hesitated just before telling you that I ‘felt pregnant’ after being with you that unexpected weekend in Berlin. I had waited a few days to say anything. But I knew the feeling. And you told me how it was for you riding back on the train. That you ‘felt pregnant’ …

And somewhere I remember saying very crisply clearly: I am a total yes to you. Whatever that meant. I had not rehearsed that line. It just spoke itself. I think I was cleaning the bathroom before I left the apartment ready for returning friends. I had asked you to help, and you did. I noticed how you helped. Everything felt easy.

And you commented that you weren’t allergic to me! And you brought all these great photos and stories of old girlfriends. We shared stories of old lovers. And our astrological charts — you brought them too! And your heart. And your depths. And your sex. And I think I talked quite a bit. We talked quite a bit. Taking it slow but intense.

We didn’t know anything. I felt a lot. We talked a lot on the phone. You came here, to Seattle, over New Year’s. And slowly, steadily, surely over the past nine months … oh, that’s for my next post …

After I pack and clean and pack some more and get this weekend’s Moving Sale behind me. But I had to take a moment today while the painters finish upstairs, and the real estate agent tries to convince me to invest $2000 in new carpeting. It’s all getting quite complete. It is complete.

And we have a date in Frankfurt on the 10th of June. How about that!?! Let’s see how this ‘baby’ turns out! After all there was no guarantee we would make it this far. Nine Months!  Yahoop! ~LP

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Beloved ~ I read your ‘beautiful dream’ and I am moved myself to just keep allowing Existence to carry me to you by whatever route is right. Yes, some shadows of ‘kicking and screaming’ and old habit to try to figure something out. Then remembering just letting go; falling into days of blissful relaxation and happiness streaming through me and all around. Trusting and yet aware of some lingering tensions in the background. I watched Drew Barrymore in that movie on long-distance relationships you saw coming over on the plane from Frankfurt. Today I had a few moments I just had to agree: long-distance relationship sucks! Not a complaint, just an observation. It’s the first time I wanted to say it. So something shifted forward since your visit. Some dream that has waited so long thru so many nights wants to be born into the light of day. Our day, our time, our life. Okay, a bit dramatic, but it is a full moon. I just feel to include this excerpt from Osho’s The New Dawn which I listened to early this morning. It’s got two great jokes at the end. i luv u, pn ~LP

…always remember: Life is not what we ordinarily experience it as. Life is much more, beyond our dreams, beyond our imaginations, beyond all our fantasies … Life is a tremendous mystery.
In a sense it is ordinary, but in a very special sense: I call it extraordinarily ordinary. Only the superficial can think of it as ordinary; otherwise, behind this apparently ordinary existence there are so many mysteries, incalculable — you just have to be open to it.
The tide is turning but it will depend on you, whether you allow it to turn or you prevent it from turning. The ordinary, normal life is not going to give you anything; it is just a burden, a drag from the cradle to the grave. Only if something of the spiritual starts happening do you start for the first time having some meaning, some significance, some blissfulness.

And as you become attuned to all these experiences, existence goes on opening new doors — doors upon doors, peaks upon peaks. And there is no end, the mystery is infinite.
On your part, all that is needed is a deep trust that wherever existence takes you, it is good. Go easily with it, without any reluctance, without any resistance, because a slight reluctance, a slight resistance immediately closes the doors.
Existence is very shy.
It never interferes in anybody’s life….

….Your consciousness is not limited within your body; it has the capacity to expand to the very limits of existence — if there are any limits. The center will remain in you, but the periphery will go on becoming bigger and bigger and bigger.
In the beginning it is certainly scary. But once you have taken the step with courage, with trust, the very experience that was looking risky becomes the most beautiful experience of life. You will ask for it, you will pray for it. Each moment you will wait for it. And this is nothing, this is only a small fragment. There are so many experiences which you may not have even heard about.
But they are all possible. You have the potential capacity for them, it is just that the society does not allow all those experiences. And society has a reason for it. If people start becoming exotic, outlandish, freaking out, suddenly dancing in the middle of the street blocking the traffic … the normal life will feel these people are disturbances….

….You are not ordinary, you are not normal — you are divine.
Once you become available to all such experiences, more and more will be coming to you. Just don’t remain confined to the world of things and objects and money and power and sensuality. Try to become more and more a man of consciousness, awareness, sincerity and truthfulness.

The New Dawn
Chap #23: Existence is very shy
www.osho.com
www.oshoworld.com

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